Where is your boy tonight?
I hope he is a gentleman
Maybe he won't find out what I know
You were the last good thing about this part of town
- Where is Your Boy Tonight, Fallout Boy
Oh hello there pop song. Yes, indeed, you are catchy. I enjoy your guitar jingle. Wait a minute, your bouncy melody disguises something insidious - do I detect a whiff of
NICE GUY SYNDROME?
Normally I digest my fair share of emo whining with a decent-sized grain of salt, because they do get my pumping to work faster than most tunes. But I had a hard time swallowing this one, and it's likely because of all the hullabaloo around Sean "is Sloppy Seconds Himself" Avery. In case you've not turned on a TV, radio or looked at a newspaper in the past few days, Sean Avery of the Dallas Stars (LOLTEXASHOCKEYTEAM) called his ex-girlfriend Elisha Cuthbert 'sloppy seconds' on camera, deliberately. It wasn't just sass-talk on the ice which would be, while classless, probably not reprimanded. But a pre-meditated seeking out of the media, in order to declare to the world that Elisha Cuthbert, is in his eyes, no better than a prostitute. NICE GOING NICE GUY. His punishment last I heard was suspension with pay, meaning he's gaining over half my annual earnings a day just sitting on his ass, being a jerk. Awesome.
So I return to Fallout Boy, who admittedly have a history of portraying the protagonist of their songs as the last nice guy in the world. In this one, he's looking to hook up with 'the best thing about this part of town'. Or, at least she was until she was interested in someone other than the narrator of the song. Once we've established that the narrator, as the Nice Guy, is hanging around in his underwear until 4 in the afternoon, waiting for her to come around to her senses and date him, he's already telling her that she 'was the best thing' until presumably she got involved with someone other than the narrator and is now 'sloppy seconds'. Double awesome.
But it's okay, because he's a Nice Guy! He'll wait for her. Also, that guy she's with? He's just a Boy. Give him up, lady, and date a Real Guy. I love how this song presumes that the protagonist of the song knows better than the woman in question does about her dating habits. We don't get a picture of whether the other guy is a jerk, or anything that indicates him as unworthy of the young lady's attention; we do however get the idea that the narrator is lazy (waiting to appreciate in value instead of manning up and getting over his crush) and self-absorbed (everything revolves around him.) What a friggin catch.
I'm pretty lackadaisical about my musical selections (Kanye West and Black Eyed Peas have occasionally found their way on my iPod) but I don't think I'll be keeping this tune.
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